We all know the commercial where a young gentleman walks all over the country asking "Can you hear me now?" into his cell phone. We are to believe that his cell carrier is covering the whole country and wherever we go, if we are using his cell carrier, we will always be covered. I am glad to know that some extensive coverage is available. My question is whether or not there is anything worth listening to?

I have read that during conversations, people are more likely to be thinking about their next comment than what the other person is saying. We all know how this feels. We all are guilty of it at one time or other. We have an important message to pass along and the intended recipient wants to tell us about how adorable their cat is. We don't really listen; we make a few non-committal noises and then pass along our message. Generally, we don't have any regrets, unless the cute cat story comes back later and we are pressed into recalling. Other times, we are on the receiving end. As we try to share conversation, we notice the blank stare, the distracted behavior, the clear signal that our message is falling on deaf ears. Then, as we process this information, we receive a message that must be more important than ours, since we are expected to listen and our listener clearly didn't. The exchange leaves us feeling slightly empty and belittled, but we move on.

I acknowledge that there are times when an urgent message needs to be relayed. But more often tha not, this behavior is an everyday behavior instead of an emergency behavior. But there is another way, one that leaves everyone feeling more fulfilled and better of htemselves and others. I propose that we slow down, take the time to listen to each other after having first rooted ourselves in a place of love and peace. The grounding of ourselves is very important. When we enter a conversation feeling good about ourselves, we are more able to make the person with whom we are talking feel good. We help them feel supported and important, allowing them to send the same feelings back to us. From a loving and supported place, we can begin an honest and loving dialougue. This is when true communication begins to take place. We hear not only the words that are said but we also feel the emotions behind the message.

This doesn't have to occur only in deep, long meaningful conversations. It can occur when you ask the checkout person at the grocery store. We can carry on conversations with people standing in line with us. We can communicate in this manner with our loved ones. When we start conversing in a more loving and meaningful way, it brings a fullness to our lives that is easily missed when we focus purely on passing our message along.

I challenge you today to slow down, center yourself and open a loving, supportive dialougue with someone in your life. To really challenge yourself, do this with someone of whom you often do not feel particularly fond. Notice how they react to you and your reaction to them. If all isn't happy violin-playing goats, don't give up. Chances are it was a better conversation then you have had before.